I have let her think I have been going to work, since I've been off for a few weeks now. She is used to me working second shift, so if I go over to her house in the morning, it doesn't really give anything away.

One thing I am bad about when I'm manic is adopting pets. My father was the same way, although I think he is far worse than me. My mom always said when they were married she was forced into the "Pet of the Month" club because he was always bringing home new animals. I recently adopted a new kitten, he is so adorable, but I'm hoping maybe that will be one of my "symptoms" to help her realize this is a concrete disorder, and not just "in my head". Maybe some of my stunts when I was in my late teens can help as well, gods know I pulled plenty of those...

I just don't want her to think I'm making excuses for the things I've done. I mean, bp is part of the reason, but it is no excuse. I still made the choices I did. I just want to be able to "show" her there really is something wrong. I just want her to understand.