Lostmom3 I used to have memories like that and react to loud noises and angry men. Being a surviver of domestic abuse can cause many emotional triggers. I too was once married to an abuser, and counseling helped. I have had therapy from T's who specialized in abuse and trauma, and I have gone to group therapy and counseling at safe houses for women.
Perhaps you can start by finding out if there is a place for abused women in your area. I think most places have an information number for services or your local hospital might have a SW who can tell you where to go. Someplace's do not say where the safe houses are and some are more open and easy to find. There is the National Domestic Violence Hotline too that can direct you to help find counseling, their number is 1-800-799-safe (7233). You can also find them on line and read about this, you are not alone in experiencing these things.
You did not cause the abuse, you were not stupid and God doesn't want people to live that way even if they are married. You did the right thing getting your son out of that situation. Things can get better. Best of luck in finding help. 
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Nammu
…Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …...
Desiderata Max Ehrmann
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