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Fuzzybear said:
talk about suicidal thoughts

post cryptically

talk to relatives (they blame me for a relatives abuse)

just be oneself and honest

be expressive

why bother



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Bother because there are people who care about you, and what you're thinking and feeling.
I'm sorry about your relatives: it's probably denial on their part and while I know it's hard not to take it personally, deep down you know you're right, and they can't/won't see it. But you're still right.
I'm not sure what the rules are regarding talking about suicidal thoughts, but it worries me that you have them and don't feel that you can talk about them. You can PM me anytime, Fuzzy.
As for being expressive, you are entitled to be, and should be. You should also feel comfortable about being yourself. After all, the people who truly know you, love you. It's hard not to be affected by the opinions of people who don't really know you, but it's worth trying to dismiss their opinions, especially if they're making you feel awful about yourself.
I don't like to see you sad, Fuzzybear.
Take care, and remember you're cared about!