I'm starting to really like Tony. We've been dating for 3 months now and so far things have been going great. We've been open and comfortable talking about our previous broken relationships before and how it had left a scar on us. He was once in a relationship for 5 years where it was very abusive. Its been 3 years since they've broken up and having no contact with one another.

As Tony and I are spending time and getting to know one another, we're starting to really want to make the next move and have a exclusive relationship. Just a few days ago Tony and had our first kiss and it got a little overly physically excited but we didn't have sex of any sort.

What disappointed me was right after he talked about his ex, 5 mins later we were still laying in bed. How she ruined his life, tried to frame him to getting her pregnant, how much he doesn't want her in his life anymore, how crazy and physically abusive she was.

It really ruined the sweet moment I had with him, being vulnerable and enjoying our time together. He's asked me about 5 different times for us to become a couple but I always said 'no' lets date a little longer. He asked me again after making out and I said no. I said that I don't want him to punish me for something that she put him through. I also said that I'm not feeling all that great with myself, after being affectionate with him and he's already talking about his ex.

What am I to do? Am I being too hard on the guy? Do you think he's still hurting or even missing his ex?