that was a good thing for you to do, and its good that your husband is feeling your pain too...it shows you have communicated your emotions very well.

your husband can now share your pain with you and help you through it, to have someone like this around you is a blessing, wish i could have a girlfreind (not wife because im only 19 hehe) who was that connected with me. we can only hope.

im happy for you that you did that, writing a letter is a hard thing to do, and the fact that you wrote 9 pages shows you needed to do it too, whether or not your deceased (im not a fan of the word "dead") father reads it or not. im sure where ever he is, he read it whilst you were writing it, he knows how you feel, and he must be so proud of you and your husband.

continue to keep up the hard work and take care.