I applaud you for your willingness to stick in a miserable situation in the hope that things can get better. Marriage is something that is getting easier and easier to give up on, and that is easy advice for people to give. From following your posts I can feel that this is not the type of person you are. Stay true to what you believe, but do take good care of yourself. It's no good to stay in an unsafe situation because you feel like you have to put up with anything and everything thrown at you. You are the only one who knows if you and your children are truly safe. If you are, and you want to continue to give him a chance, then go with that. I know from experience that much of the advice you will receive is "throw the bum out". But there is obviously a reason you don't want to do that. You are participating in therapy, and sound like you have decent support in that way. I wish you all the best.