Hey Big Mama. So glad to hear that there is a glimmer of some positive change happening with your H. That's great, however, I am very sceptical. I can't help but think of idioms like "you can't change the spots on a leopard" or "you can't teach and old dog new tricks" in this situation. I hope that your H was sincere in what he said and his apologies and not just paying lip service to the therapist so that he can look good. My H would do that - he would intentionally make sure that I was the one that looked like I had the problem and that he was sooo good and sooo willing to help in anyway he could to help resolve "my" problems. I know I sound very, very cynical but I have become that way over the years after having met and been married to master manipulators and liars. I do hope for your sake though that this therapy and the shock of a possible divorce may be the catalyst for him to realise that all is not as good as he thought and that his behaviour is unacceptable. You will need to see a concerted and persistent effort on his behalf before you will be convinced one way or the other. Only you will be able to judge whether there has been an improvement and whether it is genuine and permanent. Now that he knows the score he better behave as promised or else his words will mean nothing and you will have every right never to trust him again. He can't use the excuse that he didn't realise anymore because that has been pointed out to him in therapy. All the best and hope he means it. Good luck and god bless