Thank you all for your replies i apriciate it. Financially he can not support his children as he is not working,I am supporting the family on a pretty small wage.I do think I made a big mistake in staying for the sake of the children but i won't be able to handle my childrens pain if I do leave. i is a really sticky situation. i just don't know what to do about it. Tommorow will be a year since the affair so I am not feeling very good at the moment. My husband had the affair to "get out of the marraige" if I was mentally stable at the time I would probably have kicked him out, but as it stands I had MDD before the affair happened. The affair just caused me to get help for my self, I am much better now but worry constantly about my childrens well being