Hi Steph,
I'm sorry you're going through such a hard time. It sounds to me he's frustrated and angry because he may be feeling like a failure.
Can you cry to someone else,IRL, about it? Or you can keep coming here. I don't know if it's the same for you but we're here if you need to vent.
(((((((steph)))))))
Hang in there. You are a fighter. You should be so proud of yourself, you're doing a great job. Give yourself a pat on the back and a smile in the mirror.