Hi LookingforCalm - Your ex doesn't sound particularly happy; texting to suggest he still loves you when he is high/drunk in a strip club speaks for itself. Im just thankful you are not the woman with his child in this situation - it sounds like he doesn't deserve either their love nor yours. If you do feel that his new wife and child don't deserve such treatment, i agree with the first responder in that it is better for you to cease all contact with him - what good does it do you, him or his family? It is also wise to not risk having his current wife find out about such contact and end up assuming the worse. There is after all a child involved - someone who is defenceless and shouldn't be dragged into such a mess. Regardless of whether your ex meant what he said, how do you actually feel about him? If you are struggling to come to terms with the relationship ending and are having difficulty meeting new people because of it i would suggest therapy - bad relationships affect our self worth and self esteem terribly which in turn can cause similar relationships again and again until we learn to relate to ourselves better. I hope your situation improves. All the best.