Hi tryn2bhappy. It's hard being in a relationship where one partner does not feel appreciated enough. Relationships entail both commitment and communication. If one or the other is not forthcoming, this will not bode well for the long run. And four years is a long time really.

It is difficult to assess what is going on unless he opens up. Have you tried discussing things with him by telling him that you feel something is wrong with the relationship and you would like to talk about it. Hopefully you could both put all cards on the table, and try to determine where he is coming from (e.g. lack of contact, silence, does he want to be in a relationship). Couples therapy might also be another option..