Hey there.

Please allow me to start by saying that I am sorry for what happened to you and your sister. No one deserves that.

Secondly, in regards to not telling, understand that you're looking back on things as an adult, with different thoughts and rationale than you would have had back then. You can't blame yourself for it Hatter. Telling is something that is incredibly difficult for most adults. It is exponentially harder for children. Please don't hold yourself at fault for that.

But to the question at hand, I'd tell you that you being here is already an indicator of you being a very different man from your father. You're already displaying selflessness in not wanting to have sex out of fear of what may (and I would reassure you almost certainly won't) happen, and compassion in your care for your sister. Those were two things your father lacked. You are a better man than him, and I'm not worried about you becoming like him. You shouldn't either.