While in the NICU, I don't know if my mom held me or not. I do know that today that I don't let her get to close to me: there's much about me that I don't share with her, or with anyone other than my sister, my best friend(who is also a twin) and my boyfriend. As you can see I don't readily trust people, maybe because the possible lack of early bonding?
Anyways, I don't want to scare anyone on this forum with a premature infant, there could be many other reasons why I don't feel any attachment to my mom... It's almost like my mom is somebody else (I am not adopted as far as I know but you get the picture, right?).

I don't know if my parents were allowed to hold my sister or me given the circumstances of our birth. But I do know this:I do not allow my mom to get very close to me, there is so much I don't share with her, or with anyone for that matter. I don't readily trust people, maybe because of the lack of bonding directly after birth?
Anyways, I never felt my mom was really my mom. I know I am not adopted, my parents are indeed my biological parents as I resemble both. But since I never felt any attachment to my mom it feels like she's not really my mom( you get the picture, right?).
Lastly, I don't want to scare anyone with a premature infant. There could be other factors as to why I am not attached to my mom.