You do sound kind of depressed, which is understandable with all of your disappointments this week. (hugs) I'm sorry the day programs didn't work out but don't give up. I'm hoping the one you haven't seen yet will be the one for you!

I really think that going home for the holidays would be a good idea even though you have problems with your family. Maybe you could try to reconnect with those friends, at least one of them, in the time you have now? I also think it would be a good idea to see the VMT. Of course it will be worth it! You have a connection with her and maybe she can even help you with your dilemmas in Chicago. Even if you don't feel like seeing her now, it will be good for you. My opinion, anyway. hugs. Lots of hugs!!!