Hi Angela. You’re not a bad person wanting him to move out. It is natural to feel guilty as he is your brother. But he is clearly abusing his ‘privileges’ by showing a blatant lack of respect while living in your and your husband’s house. SO, it is not all right that you have to hide in your bedroom because of his erratic behaviour.

I think both you and your husband (presenting a united front) should have a frank talk with your brother. Non confrontational but firm nevertheless. Of course, you will couch it as you both deem fit, but basically tell him that this behaviour is not acceptable. You should *not* be afraid in your own house. And basically if he does not want to sort himself out and/or be more respectful, it might be best for him to find a job (where does he get the money to go on drinking binges?) or move in with a friend until he is sorted.