I know, I know, I know - it's o.k. to talk to your therapist about anything and it's o.k. to access T whenever necessary.

But I'm feeling stupid now because I asked for an extra session this week and now it seems like it's not necessary. I haven't cancelled because I think it makes me look too wishy washy.

My T is great. She has helped me a lot, a lot. I have worked through a lot of serious issues and she's been right there for me the whole time.

So, I'm facing something big in 3 weeks. When I faced it before in January, I had a meltdown. But I think I'm in much better shape than I was in January.

Still, Saturday night some of the old emotion was bubbling up and I was a bit concerned it might get full-blown before the mid-October event. But, I'm fine now and it just seems dumb to add an extra session (and pay for extra session) when the emotion has settled down and the odds are that I will be o.k.

So, now feeling stupid because she may be thinking I'm going through a full blown crisis and I am not. I'm in good shape. I over-reacted Saturday by texting her if she had any extra slots open this week. I guess that since I have only 3 weeks until potentially triggering event, I didn't want to take any chances.

Now, I don't know what to talk about with her. I feel like I've become a hypochondriac. This is embarrassing being 'just dumb'. And I suspect she is giving me her lunch break and that makes me feel even more ashamed because she must think I need it when I don't. Oh well...