perhaps i am wrong to think about this, but may i ask about your husband's job? does he have any hobbies, do you and all your family go out to do stuff? i understand it may be very hard for him to have all those memories, but it should have gone away now that he has you, and his own family. i think he should think of how much he suffered and think he'd never do the same to his own kids, like i myself think about the little attention i had from my parents and think i want to do the opposite, i want to be always there for them. and with my girlfriend i feel so happy and free from everything, if i end up marrying her i'd be the happiest guy in the world and i do believe every man should feel like that when they're with their wives.
my opinion is you should keep talking to him, try to insist that he gets help and someone to talk to, and maybe he could find something to do that helps him feel good, maybe get his anger out of him, find some nice activities, watch movies together and get more and more close to each other. maybe it's utopia (i looked up for that word in english, hope it's right), but he should think more clearly about some stuff and understand for himself, that all that went wrong is now long gone, you see?
wish all the best for you, hugs