On the one hand (((Bathony))), your mom and my dad would be great friends...both vicious, miserable, angry and disturbed people...

On the other hand, what everyone else is saying is right and true.

I am so sorry you have been through so much and are struggling. I really am. And i do understand all of the shame and guilt and regret over and over again...even regretting "being alive now"

Please, PLEASE, know that you do not have to carry all of this weight and burden alone. The anger, shame, guilt, memories, incidents, feelings, disgust, and all of the hatred toward others and yourself can be worked through...and possibly released too. I am also in therapy like many others to work through that; there are still many days where i also regret not doing my suicide attempt "right...and that i am still here".

But all of us - each one - are still more than the sum of parts. You do still have a lot of potential. Again, i am TRULY sorry you are suffering with so much from before and right now. I do understand that a lot can seem hopeless and that 1 is more-or-less worthless. Yet there is more...

To you i leave with ...
To everyone else here, i also leave with a