welcome, yes major denial here... taken me much time to process the idea and decide what it means to me. I mourned past highs and lows, mistakes and achievements, wondered who the f.ck I really was, but then decided that was still my life, my experiences, mine, and bp won't steal them from me. may sound dramatic, i am in that sort of mood... Seems to be a personal experience as we all have to walk our own path of coming to terms with it.