I'm trying but I don't currently even have access to a medical doctor, I'm flat broke, and can't seem to get a job. It's like fate (if there is such a thing) is completely working against me to my downfall and there's nothing I can do to stop it. I just, I don't get it. I feel so sick. Humanity is just absolutely disgusting and being around them just makes me want to lose it. I want to understand how this gathering of people on this site are all such great people but are all so miserable. But outside, I have yet to find a single good person except for my sister and the world is making her miserable too. I just want to make it better for her but I can't!!!! She's miserable and there's nothing I can do to stop it! There's nothing I can do to get better! What's the point in any of this?