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Im so sorry your feeling this way. I wish there was something I could do to help you. I know how scarry change is. I dont do well with change myself. I am here to listen if you need to talk. Hugs to you.
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Crystal 
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you have imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe become simple. 
Bipolar 1
OCD
BPD
Anxiety with panic disorder
Agorophobia
viibryd
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