Just to let everyone know I won't being coming back here for a long time, There are things going on in my life that no one can help me here on, I don't think any one here can help not even a T.or P. Ever sence the cancer deaths in my family things are turning up side down, My life became hell over nite. I don't even feel human anymore, When I need my Mother the most she is gone, O how I need her advice right now. I guess I have to sell everything and beome homeless ,Becouse The relationship I'm is falling a part and the way I feel isn't worth safing. The pain I feel is unreal, All this time this relationship has coused me nothing but pain and sadness.Something happen last nite that I never thought would happen but it did and I won't be with someone who does it . Lets say drinking and meds. I won't go in to detail, I guess I have to be homless to be happy ,Just maybe I'll never find that again, Where I am now has caused me pain heart brake ect..I'm @ a point that what I say couses more problems,Nothing is working out , I can't express How I feel becouse there is no words. When my mother died last yearI became alone, There is no one!!!!!!!! Here no family now friends nothing. Everything that I was is ALL MESSED UP. My mined and everthing is all messed up ,I don't even feel human anymore,I just don't know what to think and feel anymore , The more I try to speak the worse things get. Everyone I know thinks I should leave the mess I am in ,But where with no money no family to help nothing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm stuck. I'm a mess and I'll never find what I realy want ,I know in my heart this isn't it, I was wrong giving this a nother try ,I just thought this wouldn't happen again but it did. I have made a very wrong turn in my life and I am paying for it everyday,I am sorry PC and others I just don't know what to do with all this. I'll try to check in and check my pms.
Take Care all.