I'm so unhappy. Can't stand being married to my husband. Miss my "lovers". Ugh. Stupid me can't stop thinking of them. I cant stand myself. Feel gross and feel like my brain is in a horrible state. So depressed and disgusted I just stare into space and snap at everyone. Trying to be good and do all the right things for once in my life, and I'm miserable. Hate being on Lamictal. What's wrong with me??