Anika you're right, I'm very unhappy in my marriage. It's not like my husband is horrible. He's got a big heart and is a great dad. I just can't love him. I think the lovers I no longer have is making me so empty. My husband isn't affectionate AT ALL. Never has been. I have to financially figure out how I'd live without him but who doesn't have that worry right? I've actually been told I might not be bipolar --that I'm just trying to fill a void in my life. It has been since i got married 20 yrs ago that I got more and more moody and needy and "latchy" to lovers and.....list goes on and on. Thanks guys for giving me insight. Always appreciate your thoughts and hugs. Hugs back to you!!!