Now I know why my pDoc was hesitant to share his diagnosis of me. He says that Dx is mostly for insurance purposes, but I've been curious exactly what my problem is ~ because I've been in therapy since I was in elementary school & now I'm 41 years-old. WTH is my problem??

My pDoc decided to share the Dx: depression, BPD (nos), PTSD, and DD (nos). What truly complicates my mental health diagnoses is my epilepsy. I have, however, gone through extensive testing and observation (while hooked up to wires galore!). So, I suppose that sometimes I do depersonalize due to stress, and other times I have complex partial seizures. UGH!!

I don't know where to go to talk. WTH can understand my perspective? Shist, I don't understand myself. I feel like crying ~ but can't bring myself to do it and let some emotions go. Instead, as soon as I feel sorrow, my feelings turn off. I only allow myself to feel anger and sometimes happiness. For the most part, though, I am dull and crusty.

So many people are talking about these deep emotions & I just feel an emptiness inside 98% of the time. A very strange and uncomfortable lack of emotions. Any ideas on where I DO belong?

I keep coming to PC, to share my perspective with others. And I want so badly to get some support from others, but I lack the ambition to stand up and ask for it. Until now, of course. Thank you for reading this long post.