oh dear J, it's a lot like about the glass half full or half empty. and.. attitude. ..and being grateful just for the day with no expectations. yeah there are times i struggle with self and life stuff but to get to the meat of the matter for me it's far better walking this earth than being in it. hope that isn't offensive to anyone. i've come to realize this is my only time here so i need to make it count. i just have learned to love life. took some years, therapy, AA, friends who really cared. and even tho you are critical but honest with how you see yourself i find you a pretty special guy. well okay, for real, i think you're a really special guy. i was once told to learn to love myself. gosh that was really hard. but it does make sense. we need to be our own best friend warts and all!!