Bipolar AND major depressive disorder?! Are you being treated or are you winging it? You can get better--I did, but with a whole lot of help and a terrific support system, lots of very hard work and over a period of time.
What point are you at now? Wow, take a deep breath. You can do this, but toss that whole Bridezilla image out the window. You need to take some meditation lessons for starters, & please tell me you've got a doctor?