hi nightsky,

i'm so sorry to hear you're struggling right now. like a few others have said, i'm very surprised by your therapist! it's taken so much work to undo the damage from earlier in the year and to rebuild trust, and then he goes and effs it up again!

anyway, i had two thoughts:

1) it sounds like he was either thinking aloud or working out his own thoughts/feelings regarding that other person and what she's been saying about you. it almost as if he's treating you as the therapist (or at least as a friend) and is trying to figure out how he feels about the whole thing, with you as his helper or something. i'm not saying it's right, but just that since you're "there" (and can understand) he's using you in this way. either way, he shouldn't be telling you what he's thinking! the good news is that he's not keeping anything from you, and you know exactly where he stands on this whole issue. maybe it's a place to start when trying to process it with him.

2) i don't know the nature of the lies, but i'm wondering if it's the lie itself or the fact that she's lying that's bothering you. is what she is saying bad? or are you just bothered that it's not true? the only reason i ask is because if it's something like she is saying you're a vegetarian (lame example) and you therapist says, "yeah, i could see that being true," then it's really not that bad (like it doesn't make you a bad person). but if it's something that's damaging to your character then i can definitely see why it'd bother you, and why your therapist believing it makes it a thousand times worse. i'm sure it's the latter, but i just thought i'd check to make sure.

i disagree that this is the end of the road for you and him. yes it sucks and yes it's been (and is probably going to be) painful to work though, but i think it's important work that should be done. i think the potential for growth and healing far outweighs anything else (although i get that you might not be interested in that, and just want t to be t!)

sending lots of 's your way..