Hi,

I'm still wondering whether I'm in the right place at the moment. I haven't been to my GP yet about my mental health but I'm reasonably sure I am bipolar even though there is this voice inside my head telling me to stop being so damned ridiculous.

I've always been what I just thought was a little left of center to everybody else ... always a bit erratic and generally confused with the way my mind works. When i was 18 i met and fell in love with a boy who was bipolar and I think my tendency to be drawn towards people with mental illnesses has stopped me from recognising my own.

I've been consumed with this one thought for days now ... "I think i'm bipolar". It won't go away and I'm so sure it's right. It makes sense to me. I know what it looks like in other people.

I'm mostly concerned that those who know me won't see it. They'll think I'm being dramatic, stupid... foolish. I'm not an unsuccessful person... I'm productive most of the time and capable with lots of what is thrown my way. The thing is they don't see what I see in me. They don't know how hard I've struggled to regulate my life.

I'm not quite sure this was what I am supposed to write here, haha.