Or any stimulant medication, really....

I see people saying that sometimes ADHD medicine makes them feel "zombie like" and things of that sort. What do they mean? How can I tell if this is how normal people feel ( i don't remember ever feeling "normal"...) or if it is having a drugged or zombie effect on me? Is this how it feels to be "normal" and live a "normal" life? I have a hard time believing that not feeling anxious (at least a little...) all the time and not worrying all the time is normal. I have a hard time believing that looking forward to things (as opposed to DREADING social activities) is normal. (sad much?... ) I will list out what I'm feeling differently.

- Much more understanding.
- I have always been talkative- but its more so now. Not to strangers or anything weird though. Although, I will speak to a stranger now if they speak to me and I don't feel like I'm going to panic while doing so.
- Much more loving. (which i think could be from not being so stressed)
- I can pay attention a lot more.
- I comprehend things better (I think this may from being able to actually pay attention to what people are saying...)
- I can think things through instead of just doing something because it pops into my head.
- Depression GREATLY reduced.
- I had anxiety that didn't respond to any medication. SSRI'S made me MUCH worse and Buspar made me more paranoid. (but a little less anxious... )
- I feel like I can actually lay down and rest without my mind thinking about 1 BILLION other things I could be doing. Before, I would feel guilty about resting and that would make me more anxious and depressed. I don't feel guilty anymore for taking a rest, I just simply remind myself that I do need to get moving in the next (for example, 20 minutes) and that is that.
- Last but not least, I have one VERY intense phobia. I'm still very much afraid of this thing, but* when it comes up I can remind myself (90% of the time) that "yes, my fear is very real- but just because the fear is very real, doesn't mean that it is something that I really NEED to be afraid of." I can talk myself out of completely panicking- which is something.

The bad is....
- I can't sleep at night.
- My brain can and will still hop from one subject to another. But I'm just glad I can process the things it is hopping to and from. Before it was just like a blur. I knew my brain was thinking about so many things- but I couldn't even tell you what. Kind of like when you see something out of the corner of your eye and you KNOW you saw something, but have NO idea what. That's the best way I can explain it....
- Somehow it still catches me by surprise when my meds wear off every evening and I can't concentrate. I don't know if I can concentrate worse in the evening now than before I took meds at all, or if there is just a huge difference- therefor I notice it a lot.

Let me add, I do get anxious/nervous about things if need be, and still sometimes to a greater degree than I should- but its a WORLD of difference. My husband says he sees a HUGE difference in a good way.