Simon is right on. wish he had been in my back pocket when i was going through the same thing with my mom. it took me five years of therapy to learn what he just told you in a few paragraphs.

you can eventually stop it by ignoring it and removing yourself, if only by 10 feet, when she starts on you. or leave the room....or pick up a book and start reading.......

it's doubly sad when it's our moms...but we can't change them. we can only change how we "take" it and we can learn the lesson to never do anyone else the way that that we've been done.......love, pat