so i've been
"seeing" this guy for about 6 months. we like each other, opened up a lot about each other (at least i did, now i'm not sure if he did or not...), and i've let my guard down a significant amount considering he isn't my
"boyfriend". i know it might sound stupid, but i don't even open up to my "boyfriends" that easily (at first). i usually keep composure and don't let people see me in distress or freak out, or anything of that sort, unless they're a really good friend of mine and i trust them.
well this weekend i ended up breaking down to/in front of him.... i was/still am super embarrassed, but i had no choice and it didn't even seem to phase him...
well... i brought up the whole "what are we, where are we going with this" talk and ended up telling him that i don't think i would be comfortable continuing to "casual date" with the amount of info i tell/i've told him; especially since we're having sex... he's mentioned before that he's commitment phobic, which i understand, but i don't feel comfortable and am no longer comfortable with acting like i'm ok with something i'm not. it seemed that he was withholding information which seemed to relate with his problem with relationships and he played the "dodge game"; which i recognize since i'm a pro at it.
to sum everything else up, he said he has no issue with being exclusive, but is against being in a relationship. i agreed to give him a couple of days to think about it, but to be honest i've already started re-building my wall up since last night. i'm honestly frustrated and a little hurt, because i feel like i've been very patient and understanding compared to how i used to be and i feel betrayed.
i'm just curious. what is the big deal about getting into a relationship?? why is it so different than exclusively dating?? i understand people think "being in a relationship" comes with more responsibilities/expectations/etc. but when i clearly state that there will be no added expectations or anything else of that sort...
what is the big deal?!
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"I was born with an enormous need for affection, and a terrible need to give it"
- Audrey Hepburn
"The only easy day was yesterday" - U.S. Navy SEALS