I don't think it is, no. I think it is an opening for a discussion about what you think she might do that would be helpful. Not that we have the answer, or should have the answer, but just a way of giving us an opportunity to offer any idea(s) we might have. It's also an opportunity to say what we wish therapy could be like, even if we can't yet do that. I have said many times that I wish I could say more, and I wish I could speak more freely. It isn't something we jump on and do right then, but we do talk about it, and it and what the obstacles might be. It gives my T information about what I want so we both know, instead of me just silently wishing.

One thing I have worked on is being able to express fears that arose when she said certain things. I was always looking for hidden meanings, hidden agendas, a sign that things weren't going well or that she was going to become mean because she was upset with me. It never happened, it was just my fears making me think these things. It takes time and talking about the situations to see the fear. Relief from the fears comes by understanding them and being able to recognize when fear is running the show.