I think the worse part is figuring out what "normal" is. When I went to the pdoc yesterday, she asked how I felt, and I said "ok". I mean, I guess for me being 'ok' is not being depressed. I hate depression, and I'd rather be manic. Although since being manic tends to give me a really short temper, it's not ideal, but at least I can move. So when do I know when I've stabilized?

Before my dx I always sort of though my mania was "normal" because I didn't necessarily feel bad. I've done a lot of stupid, and I realize now that it is part of the impulsiveness that comes with mania, but I've never felt necessarily 'bad'. Sorry to rant, I just wish I knew what I should be looking for.