Quote:
Originally Posted by Irreplaceable
I'm so confused by what he meant @ the bolded up top... Sounds like an oxymoron? But anyway, I will give advice just like you are a female friend telling me these things...
He's telling you how he feels and what he thinks.... Believe him... He doesn't want a relationship, you can't force him.... He doesn't want to be with you and be exclusive, believe him... If you ignore it, you could be one of those females posting messages/threads online about how she doesn't understand why her man has cheated and or doesn't want to be with her. Dude already told you up front... Accept it, or move on...
If this man truely felt that you were "the one" or someone that he could be with long term, he would make it official with you... He wouldn't want another man to snatch you up, he wants to beat another man to it... If he isn't ready now, then he isn't ready... But I still firmly believe, and I say this over and over, if he wants you, he will be with you and there will be no confusion because he will make it very clear to you that you are who he wants/ what his intentions are...
Now what I would do is, let him know that I was interested in more, but won't be waiting around for him.... Ease back on the communication, start to detach myself from him emotionally and mentally and keep my options open.... If he comes around, great, if not, at least he told you up front so that you are not investing time and energy into someone who doesn't want the same things that you do... OR, you could just stay with him and wait it out... But my opinion on that is, he has the upper hand... Good luck! Find a man who won't have to think twice about making it official!
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actually when this conversation first started, he said he would understand if i distanced myself because of his hesitation and he knows that i don't open up easily. the last conversation about this topic was 2 days ago where i told him that i'm not happy and don't feel comfortable with just "casually dating", especially with the amount of info i've shared with him. it might not seem like a big deal to most people, but i don't open up my emotions and share things that mean a lot to me with someone i'm just "aimlessly dating". i have no problem with the idea of casually dating, but that's how i feel; maybe because i feel betrayed in a sense.
i do agree that if he really wanted to make it official and didn't want to lose me he would've done it already. if that is the case, i guess i just wanted him hear him say it which probably isn't going to happen.
i also agree that it indeed
is an oxymoron when he isn't against being exclusive but is very against being in a relationship.
honestly, i was very close to calling it off (and still kind of am actually). i already started distancing myself; he was supposed to have an answer by now and i feel like he's avoiding it. i want to ask him for the verdict, but at the same time i don't.
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