Aww Flipper, I am sorry I didn't see this earlier... Sorry things are going so rough, and ya with bipolar it happens hey. I found things for me got better slowly, as I accepted and found the best ways to manage it for myself. I know it can seem like it will never get any better, or that it's always goon suck, but it just takes time, and time to figure out what works for and what doesn't.
But nice to have you here, I hope you keep posting!