I'm not one to diagnose myself, i actually hate it when people do that. I just really want some answers for what is going on.

I have had OCD, depression and psychosis on and off since I was about seven years old. Recently people have been commenting on my mood changes. I'm 15 and I know that it's normal to have moodswings at this age, but they get in the way of everyday things like friendships and school. I've nwver done drugs or alcohol and I take Zoloft/Sertraline.

I get into severely depressed stages where I feel helpless and worthless and suicidal. I had a major depressive episode that lasted from November 2011 until about May 2012 and I was self harming and school was involved, I was taken to psychologists, intervention teams, doctors etc. It got so bad that I was extremely close to just walking out of school and killing myself. I planned it actually, I felt so hopeless and pathetic. I'd lost all of my motivation, I had headaches constantly (I still have them most days), I couldn't concentrate and I was withdrawing from everything. I had a breakdown in school and they punished me and just dropped contact. It was hell. Thinking back now, it feels like I was in a bubble of my own and nobody could reach me.

Without warning I get into really hyperactive moods where I am so inexplainably happy that I can't concentrate or focus. I have A LOT of energy and need to keep moving (bouncing my leg, fidgeting, exercising etc), I stumble over my words because my mind races ahead and I feel speeded up and irritable. I'm really impulsive and loud, whereas when I'm depressed I withdraw from everyone and I'm cold towards everything in general, in these moods I'm confident and sociable. I take on too much at once and am over-friendly to people and really excited. The I crash. I become depressed again or go back to normal until it happens again. Sometimes these moods last for hours, days, weeks or months.

I also get extremely aggressive. People often comment about how defensive and agitated I get. Little things set me off into rages where I feel so frustrated that I get this ringing in my ears and start crying and I get this huge load of energy that I have to hurt myself to release it (biting myself, scratching, hitting etc). When I'm irritated I attack people verbally, and when I'm in these moods I enjoy getting into heated arguments and throw insults at the other person to provoke them.

Is this a mood disorder or something? Thanks for reading.
~ WTTJ