Oh Shadow.....Please don't ever worry about that, and I mean it. I think we all need to take care of ourselves, and then if there is something left over, then maybe we reach out to others. But if just surviving is taking up all we have, and that time doesn't come, then that's okay too. It's understood And thank you for your kind words. I just have to appreciate whatever good comes, and keep learning to deal with the rest. And things can (and do) change so quickly. Seriously, just yesterday I felt a similar way to what you're expressing today.....all day I was so aware of my isolation and "aloneness", and yet today here I am. I hope something like that happens for you soon ~whimsy