You better not do that I think it's good you told them too much pressure about dinner - that kind of thing is good if you can in the moment figure out what you're feeling and say it to someone, before acting on it. Crying is great, anger is fine, breaking dishes is something I love doing when I'm mad. I even have a mini junkyard in my yard, and go smash **** up when I need to. I totally understand wanting to hurt yourself, and I think you're at a place where it's become habit. You have to break this habit now to save your life.

Your parents' reaction... honestly as a mom who's stayed calm (on the outside, then cried to my T) while seeing the cuts of my children, your parents are freaking the f.ck out inside. They are staying calm or looking calm outside because they love you and don't want to make you have to worry about them. They want you to be OK, hun. And now you're at this age in between child and adult... I'm 39, and having my mom just leave town, I felt like a kid having to become an adult all over again. And it doesn't feel that great when you feel unstable and not sure what's going to happen next.

Clinte, I think it's time for you to draw on your inner sense of self. You are a creative, compassionate being. You are unique. Your poetry is awesome. You have a great sense of humor. You gotta believe in yourself hun, you gotta know you can do this, because you can, I believe in you and so many others here do too. Those mistakes in the past, they make you stronger wiser, because you're a sensitive man and you've spent much time contemplating everything that happened. I would love to see you stop punishing yourself, and begin to love yourself sweetie. You are loveable, you are caring, you are kind. If you're bipolar, and misunderstood, that's ok, that's just how it is right now. If you're angry, let it out in a way that doesn't involve bleeding. It's just dangerous, please, I worry about you.

I can't give great advice about cutting because I don't really understand it...I've had the temptation and it's weird like where does that come from. I've tried to understand it to save my kids' lives and help them stop doing it. I've spent time in chat here on pc, and received a lot of help from people on the topic. I don't know if you go in the chat rooms here, but I think you'd benefit from it. SI is a frequent topic, and whoever is there works on it with whoever else is there. Just go into the 'Lobby' and then to any room, if it's a private room it'll ask you for password but they rarely require a password. Sometimes I go in and am looking for support, then find I'm guided to helping someone I meet in there. It's an interesting dynamic. Go in the chat room called 'Support' anytime if you need it or feel like you can offer it to someone. I'm trying to think of things you can do to get your mind away from SI distract yourself enough until the pattern changes. I will go in chat with you in you want You are worth it honey, you are meant to be here!