I absolutely understand this way of thinking. I have done similar things. I figure out something that is causing me problems and go into therapy the next session saying - "this is the issue, I want to change/get rid of this bit so that I can feel better, now what can you do to help me get there!" - and honestly being logical that makes sense to me. My therapist does not agree though. I think in some ways she may be right in that there is rarely a step by step 123 approach...otherwise wouldn't they have given it to us already?! But that does not stop my frustration at not being given the help I want in the way I want it!...Strangely enough though this denial from my therapist often leads to anger which leads to other emotions and things do move on. Irony anyone?!

So I absolutely get your way of thinking and kudos to you for being proactive! But is it possible by feeling you have to take control you are actually feeding your detached protector - doing exactly what she wants you to do? I mean she is probably on full alert if she feels the other person is powerless (I find that really scary) and about to be terminated. I would go in to therapy and 'take control' in a different way...by giving up the control and changing the pattern of what you normally do 5 sessions before the end. I'd go in there and get angry or upset or scared...or if that is impossible, simply not being directive....urg that sounds really unhelpful to you because you sound like me very logical and not interested in the airy-fairy nature of stuff....but might be worth a try?

I would be interested to know what happens - what you decide.