Could it be in the way you're approaching the subject?

Instead of saying ,"right. This is the issue - how do we destroy the detached protector mode?"

Maybe you could say, " Maybe the issue revolves around the detached protector mode. Would working on weakening or illiminating that be helpful at all?"

Asking a question rather than telling her what you think she is missing may be the way to avoid the anger reaction. Maybe she feels like you're insulting her intelligence or something. I don't know- just a suggetsion.