Quote:
Originally Posted by WePow
So there have been tons of changes at work - massive changes. And changes in my T's office. Bottom line is on Friday I lost it at work... again...  The good thing is that I didn't get into trouble this time, althought I have been on pins the entire day waiting for HR to swoop from the sky and snatch me up! But my boss said I did everything right.
I don't remember much. I do know one alter was very much SU minded, and did send T an email. That was perfect because after that, I was gone. I was up on the roof at work huddled in a corner just crying ... I could hear it but could not reach myself. My T was calling on the phone and I kept trying to push forward to answer it but he said I hung up on him several times and he said it sounded like a baby trying to answer the phone - just crying.
Anyway, my S/O came to get me at work, but I kept going out of it and could just hear a baby scream crying! It was like I wanted to go help the baby but could not get there!
In my T's office, he was not in yet, but another T was there who heard me in the hall outside T's office - he had told my S/O to bring me over and he would be right in. I remember the other T taking ahold of my hand and that made Baby stop crying as much. Then baby was about to go to sleep! I felt like we had trouble holding up our head.
T came to get me from the other Ts office with my S/O. He was able to bring me back and do EMDR with me a bit to get me safe.
But wow! That was a new experience for me!
I found out this weekend that my mom did have a very stupid lady next door who never had her own child tell her to let me "cry it out" !!! My mom said it broke her heart to hear me cry that way and they would go outside and lock me in the house. My mom appologized and all. I do forgive her. But I think that could have been when that baby was formed.
I am not finding much information about how to deal with infant alters.
Any links?
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I once asked my therapist and psychiatrist what to do if it turned out that I had any alters that were baby like, that seemed to be under the age of 1 or 2. they told me working with infant alters is the same as working with older alters. you find out what is triggering them, then use your self nurturing skills and grounding, mindfulness tools to calm you and the infant alter, just like you would if you were feeling dissociative and like a 5 or 10 yr old.
it worked for me when ever I was in my all I can do is cry type alters. maybe it will work for you too.