*** POSSIBLE TRIGGER? ***
Thanks so much for this post. I know it was hard for you and that you are having an extremely difficult time. It is nice to know that someone feels the same exact way as I do...

I have been going through a whole lot lately. From losing the love of my life, to having some physical things happen. I feel like I am falling apart emotionally and physically.

I also feel like my time here is limited. Ever since I was a child, I thought I would die young. I didn't even think I would get to my 20's. I did, but I still have that feeling that I won't live long. I am actually okay with that. I kind of embrace not feeling all this pain and grief anymore. I think that there is something left for me to do. I don't know what it is. I kind of feel like I will die saving someone else. I would be happy with that, there are people that deserve to live more than I do. People that are stronger than me who embrace life and not spit at it. I think that would be a good way to go out, and I just don't have joy anymore.

So I know how you feel and I feel the same way. I know this post probably didn't help, but hopefully it at least showed that there are others who feel as you do and that you aren't alone. Also, that you helped a little bit by showing me that I am not alone in this feeling either. Take care.