I'm going to call my psych first and give this a few more days but I feel like I am losing my mind. My psych pulled me off 75 mg of Seroquel (regular), put me on 40 mg of Geodon and doubled my dosage of Lamictal from 200 to 400 mg. I am such a mess right now I am seriously thinking I may need to be admitted to the psych hospital.

I'm nauseated, constantly burning up and shaking like crazy. All day yesterday and part of the night I kept hearing a little girl talk--at times I couldn't understand her, at other times she was talking about what sounded like her cat. Then most of the night last night I kept hearing a cat meow. If I had run into a cat outside our house this morning I think I would have thrown it over the fence. (Not really, but you know what I mean). I've heard voices on and off today but I can't understand them. Yesterday was the first time I actually understood the voices.

I keep swinging between being furious and crying. I just had a total breakdown in front of my husband. The kids are in bed, I was putting laundry in and he kept asking what was wrong. I started crying and just kept telling him I don't know and I think I'm losing what is left of my mind. I need to take a shower and I thought to myself I need to take my razor out of the shower because I want to hurt myself. Not kill myself but self injure.

Is this withdrawl from the Seroquel being stopped cold turkey? From my Lamictal suddenly going from 200 mg to 400 mg? I really don't want to go into the hospital---I have an eight year old, five year old and one year old, my husband has enough stress from work and his mom to choke a horse and my parents will raise hell with me if I do because they have "enough to worry about" and "nothing is wrong" with me.

If you've read this far, God bless you. I think I'll go cry some more and drown my sorrows in diet peach Snapple. Or hit stuff. Or go to sleep. Or stay up all night. Whatever sounds good from one moment to the next.