The one thing I have found that works in real life & on line is using the communications skill that they train managers with at work. We had to learn how to deal with people with all kinds of backgrounds. To that training, I added the fact that I wanted to treat people the way I wanted to be treated....."with respect" & to build up their confidence in the job they are doing. I remember having a recient college grad working on the project I was on. He initially came across as being rather lazy & not caring about the work he was doing. I realized that he was extremely intelligent & thought that he wasn't being given enough responsibilities. I would talk him through some of the work but he did the work. From there, I kept adding things he had to do & from there, the rest of the guys realized how good he really was. I found out from experience that without giving people the ability to be themselves, then tend to not have the desire to excell with their strengths....& everybody has their strengths. Also, I wanted to make an environment where everyone felt safe enough to say what they wanted to say. Those were the things that management training showed me were the right way to work well with almost everyone. Unfortunately, when I didn't end up being treated that way, I had a huge problem in the area where I worked & that was when I ended up with huge anxiety attacks & went out on medical leave of absense. I can truely see where the way a person is treated makes all the difference how they can relate to their work situation & it also can effect their mental & physical wellness. I try hard to always accept everyone's thoughts......I may not always agree, but that doesn't mean that I don't accept what they say as being valuable thinking. I also learned from my Mother how much she would take things I said personally. I always felt that what I said was what I meant & if she took it personally, it was her problem & not mine as to how she took it. I would always leave her alone to sort it out & sooner or later, she would come around & it would just end up going away with time. I always knew what she was doing....she was always allowed to say what she thought & I wouldn't be manipulated by her to not be entitled to the same respect. I also have always felt that if someone is accused of something....they have a right to tell their side of the situation. I have been in the middle of something like that where only one side was presented.....I was not about to let it stop there.....I have always felt that both sides should be presented. These are all parts of responsible communication & it usually works out for both sides of a conversation when both sides are allowed to represent themselves openly.

This is a great post & a good site to check out,
Debbie