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I have many a rough patch with my parents. They treat me differently. I ruined mums life she told me. She was 16 and smart and had the world at her feet, then I ruined it all. She's 33 and never had a job, lost her friends, stays at home everyday while my dad works. I think she resents me. But I don't think she realises the way she is.
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No wonder you struggle. You probably didn't have the chance to develop healthy self-esteem and interpersonal skills in that environment!
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My depression is the reason I dropped out of 6th form college. I feel like I'm losing my friends too. I have an amazing job I a so lucky to have which totally turned it around, but I sometimes feel as if I've made the wrong choices when my parents hate the choices I have made and want me back in education even though the job I have most people could of gone to uni to get a job in publishing.
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do you feel haunted by what your parents tell you? THey probably aren't even RIGHT... and you do the choices for you, not them. You need to live for yourself.
You have great job... appreciate it. If you don't want to go back on education, don't.
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They tell me I just use it as an excuse for everything. Which is contradictory as they didn't know I had depression until they were called to a&e in October 2011.
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well, tbh, we tend to do that. Use it as excuse, when we are in reality just scared of making choices.
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I'm happy, or at least I thought I was, but always sad at the same time. Like constantly in the background. I still don't know how.
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maybe time to redefine what you think "happy" is. You can live quite at peace with depression.
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I let depression control my life and now I'm never going to go to university, never going to local in the city and be that top business woman I dreamed of, I'm never going to do What I wanted because I let it tell Ms I couldnt.
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You CAN. Plenty of what YOu want. and who cares you will not do what your mother wants?
I think you should attempt at some therapy. with this background... don't let anybody dismiss your feelings as mere chemical imbalance. It's not. You been hurt. and you deserve better.
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Glory to heroes!
HATEFREE CULTURE