I am addicted to food. >< I am not sure if I can be classified as a binge eater, but I love being full. I think about food all the time. It drives me crazy to the point where I HAVE to eat.

I used to be so good. I was on a calorie diet, I was on it for 2 years. I kept to it so well. I kept a logbook of everything I had ever eaten for 2 years. I rarely went over. I had lost so much weight.

It all went to hell when I recently moved. I lost my logbook. I lost my motivation. I became very very depressed upon moving. I am quite unhappy with the way my life is going, and eating helps me feel better. When I am full I feel so much better. I feel warm and fuzzy, instead of empty and cold.

It is at the point where I cannot sleep unless my stomach is completely full. I used to stay away from bad food. I used to count my calories. Now I just eat everything. Cereal, sandwiches, mac and cheese. Ugh. I want it all. >< I have lost all focus. What am I to do? I get more depressed when I think about how much I am eating, which leads to more eating! I wish I had help. I have gained weight in 2 months. I feel terrible. My self esteem is vanishing, I am becoming even more anxious around people because I feel I look like **** now.