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jessiespade · Oct 10, 2012, 08:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Leed

You know -- I think you answered your own question -- you said you were "Fantasizing about you just not being together." I think that's a good idea.

I don't think the two of you SHOULD be together. He has some huge issues with anger, and some day it's going to come to a head and you just might get hurt. Are YOU a part of that anger? Who knows cause he's not telling. He definitely needs INDIVIDUAL counseling. You two could go to couples counseling but I don't think it would do any good, He needs to go FIRST all by himself. I'm not even sure that YOU NEED it.

Sweetie, why don't you two take a long break from each other while he gets some counseling? You need some space to think about this since you've been dreaming about being without him anyway. See what it's like and then make up your mind. But right now things just aren't right.

I wish you the very best. Wll you PLEASE let me know how you come out? I'd really like to know. God bless and take care. Hugs, Lee

I think that no one is in the position to tell someone in a relationship whether they SHOULD NOT or SHOULD be together. You do not know their background, experiences or what they have gone through together.

Suggesting that a couple take a break may bring them closer or break the relationship, given that there are already negative feelings now. And if the guy has abandonment issues, it is the most painful thing that you can do to him.

He suggested couple therapy. That is a positive start. Why refuse to even give him that chance to make things better?

Bottomline is, do you love him? Do you think he loves you? If he has personality issues due to some stuff from the past, he is ILL. It is his illness that is causing pain for BOTH of you. He is in pain too, or he wont be affectionate to you again. Understanding and support for his condition goes a long way.