This is too much to deal with right now.

I feel like I get when I'm starting to shut down, hybernate where nobody can find me, and be a hermit.

Can't tell if the constant headache is from stress, or leftover from the wreck I was in, or maybe my head was about to blow right off my body several times this week.

As long as I don't start having shooting, tingling pain in my arm, shortness of breath, palpatations, etc., I suppose I'll be great.

But I'm definitely on my way down. I just hope it doesn't spiral down to the point where it has gone the last few times. Keeps getting worse and worse.

I'm losing interest in everything that made me ME. Today I even removed something from my cubicle wall. It was a print-out from a website that takes writers on retreats in Paris. I wanted to go so badly last June, but didn't have the money saved. Thought I might go in November, but it's fast approaching and I don't have the money.

I'd say, "Maybe someday," but how can I get excited about flying (which I adore) when I barely able to keep myself upright and awake in a chair.