Yikes!I know what you mean! Complete refusal to admit even to yourself cos then you have to make room for it, deal with it. And ugh, there just ISN'T space for it! Problem is, denial leads to build-up, build- up leads to unravelling, which leads to hair ripping! What do I do? Loud music, preferably something that makes me cry and scream. I run, try and scrub it off, cos that physical release helps so much more than trying to make sense or fight it... I feel for you Anika hope you feel better real soon